Things I NEVER Imagined I'd Do

I've written a post titled this before.  You can read it HERE.  (But Kellyn won't want to since it deals with a boar's head.)

But this is again something I never thought I would do.

Today I went shopping for Jock Cups.  Which, actually, are not called Jock Cups.  They are actually called Flex Cups.  But come on, we all know what Jock Cups are and we wouldn't know what Flex Cups are.  Also, I would not suggest google searching such words.

Anywhoo.

I left the boys to find them for themselves while we shopped for groceries at Meijer.

They came back with chin straps.

This is when I began to get worried.  Because did my boys really want their mama calling for assistance to find jock cups?  Because you know that's what would happen.  They were happy to look for them on their own...and eventually found them.  They kept them in their own cart they pushed around the store, not wanting me to see them at all.

When I went to check out I looked at the selection of jock cups, mouth guards, deodorant, axe spray and sport formula febreeze I had in my cart.

I never thought I would buy these things.

I mean, when my boys were all sweet and little itty bitty, did I ever once pause to think, "Thirteen years from now I will be buying jock cups"?  No.  I did not.

But that's just what I did today.

After the grocery run, we had to head to a doctor's appointment for S1's Sports Physical.  Middle school is new territory for us all and I had no idea that he needed one to play football this year.  And his first ever football season starts Monday.

On our way to the doctor's office, we stopped at Burger King.  The boys have never eaten there.  S1 and S2 were pretty thrilled they had something called a bacon sundae and had to try it. S4 was thrilled there were crowns.  He begged me to wear it and beamed with pride and joy when I wore it out of the restaurant to the suburban.  S1 and S2 didn't quite walk with the three crowned members of their family.

We had a little time to kill and since we had already looked at and purchased jock cups, we headed to Bob's Gun and Tackle.  I mean, why not?  There we purchased ammo, gun cleaning kits, camouflage coat and shirt and various other things I have no idea of.  I also purchased a candle.  I mean, come on, with all this boy stuff I needed a girly candle and shockingly, they had an amazing vanilla smelling candle.

We arrived at the doctor's for the sports physical with the boys telling me what an awesome day this was.

S1 has reached that age where I asked him if he wanted me to tag along in the waiting room.  I acted like it was no big deal but if he had said no I think I would have called a girlfriend to sob that I was no longer needed any longer by my son.  But he did want me there!  He did not want his brothers.

So I gave the other three the biggest stink eye stern face you must behave look I could muster and off I went with S1 to get his sports physical.

Technically it was called a well child check up.

You know, the ones that little babies go to?  The very ones I took him to at three months, six months, nine months...etc.  Now it's once a year...

And now instead of being glad he grew a little I learned he had grown FOUR INCHES in one year.

However, he is exactly one quarter inch shorter than me.

We had thought he was taller but that quarter inch is a big deal and I am still taller! Woohoo!  I did a happy dance, he was crushed.  But he knows it won't last long...he'll beat me in height soon enough.

But when it came time to check "his boy parts", they asked if he wanted his mom there.  "She would probably not like to see this," he said so they ushered me out.

I gave birth to the boy!!! Hello?

But I chatted with all the nurses in the back room and scored a great almond cookie recipe.

When I called Jake to tell him how the appointment had gone, he asked me if the jock cups had jock straps.

I was not aware such things existed.

So, off to the store we went again and stood in front of the jock cups and straps and all sorts of manly things.

After all that, I needed a Biggby.  With an extra shot.

All in all, it was really a pretty great day.

One I may not recover from for some time but great all the same.

And the boys don't seem too traumatized...but again, these are things I never imagined I would do.

What else will I have to do now that they are getting older?

Wait, don't tell me.  I need no more boyish things today.

Friday, the First Digital Detox Day

Sarah and camera man Jason arrived at our house around 9:45 Friday morning. Considering the news is over at 9am, I thought they made amazing time.  

And it was soooooo good to see Sarah again.

She did an interview with me at the dining room table and they shot some video of us shutting the tv's off - I mean, literally pulling the plug.  Literally.

When they packed up and left there was just silence.

Eerie Silence.

The boys looked at me like I had all the answers.

"Let's go grocery shopping!" I announced cheerily.

We drove the 20 minutes into Plainwell without a radio.  S4 declared this "so weird."

In Meijer I was searching for a lip stick that Sue had told me about.  It stays on all day, super cool....couldn't find it.

What I'd give for texting right then.

Heck, what my BOYS would give for texting right then because hanging out in a makeup isle is not their "thing".

We got groceries.  S3 thought it tiring and pulled this stunt to rest while we shopped.  Normally I would not allow this...I know it looks unsafe...but we had to get a picture and video before I bribed him with a donut.

That's right.  I bribe my kids with food.  It works.

 S1 found the COOLEST shirt for Daddy.  The boys have been playing Angry Bird marathons lately and they had literally woken up early so they could play one last game before Daddy went to work Friday.  I would have emailed this pic to Hubby for sure.

 S1 found his perfect shirt.  He's hoping to get "sick" a lot this fall.

 I had to turn my phone on once while in the store.  To check the time only.  Because we had to get to school before one.  S4 was about to get Student of the Month at school and I had been unsure how the day could be pulled off.  Well, it looked like it would all go perfectly smooth.

And it did.  He just thought he had to follow his class into the Clipper Room and then he'd get his school work for missing school Friday and Monday.  He had no idea he was about to be the kindergarten student of the month.

 The very best part? Because we technically weren't at school that day, all his brothers were there to see him.  And they all cheered for him.  It was the sweetest moment.

 I didn't think his grin could have been happier.....but it sure could get sillier.

 This is Blake.  He is one grade above S4.  And you know, we have to sing the "We beat you song" whenever we can to Blake and his brother.  I was so thrilled he was awarded Student of the Month too.

It is so something I would be facebooking/tweeting/texting/emailing/blogging.

The boys weren't sure they wanted to go home.  I mean, what did they have to do?  You know, other than homework.

S1 settled into a good book.  I started the never ending laundry.

 The boys brought in Bunny and Whiskers.  Shortly after this photo was taken, Whiskers got lost.  We found him (finally) behind our tv.

You know, the one that was unplugged now.

Another bit of information I would have been tweeting "Whiskers the bunny lost in our house!"

So when the boys were super tired (they were up very late the night before, knowing they weren't headed to school the next day) and cranky...I was so wishing there was a movie I could turn on for them to veg.

 Instead the bickered and complained.  Whiskers got left on the table to oversee the chaos.

That's when I got the notebook out.  Here is what the boys had to say....

S2 "This is going to be kinda sad and kinda fun.  We aren't usually watching tv so it's fine, but I'd really like to play Angry Birds."

S1 "It sorta feels like I am being punished."

S3 "It's going pretty good."

S4 "I'd be playing football with my stuffed animals and bunny either way so either way it's fine."

But it wasn't fine.

Soon they had cards all dealt out and cocoa made and it was very apparent that Moma was the person to entertain them for the next who knows how long.

But Moma was tired from a late Praise and Coffee the night before and an early morning getting ready for the day.  We opted for a nap...which only worked for an hour.

My mom called me to let me know she was out shopping and had nearly texted me numerous times.  I missed her - and all connections I had with friends right then.

When Daddy came home (seven phone calls later, he mighta have become used to text as much as me, even if he didn't admit it), he commented on how quiet it was.  

Here the boys are yelling and screaming through the house 

and we are commenting on how quiet it is.

But gathered around the table to learn to play Rook for the first time, we learned that S2 doesn't know how to spell S1's name.  S1 began to recite "Fuzzy Wuzzy Was a Bear" and all the boys found it so funny they nearly fell out of their chairs.

I figured music makes us all get along better.  Because Fuzzy Wuzzy isn't really something you want stuck in your head.

We gave up on cards and I settled in to read - READ, the one thing I was so looking forward to this weekend - but husband finds reading as thrilling as watching paint dry so we all just gave up on the night and went to sleep.

I think the knowing that we had no digital-ness for a weekend was the worst part of Friday.  It was FRIDAY....and we had the whole weekend to look at.  It seemed long. 

So

Very

Long

And as my exhausted head hit the pillow I mumbled to my husband sleepily, "I missed hanging out with just you and cuddling tonight."

"Tomorrow," he promised.

Our Story Airs on Fox 17's 10 pm news on Tuesday, November 15th.

You can view the story link HERE.