Of Cats and Poison Ivy

Georgia the cat came back. Shocking but true.

I got poison ivy, but on my arms and not where I had scrubbed with tecnu. Then a friend told me to put milk weed on it and it dries it up. And it worked.

So now you are updated on our Sadie story.

The Snake That Got Away

I feel I am stable enough to send this post out (I type as I check under my computer desk again). We have an escaped snake on the loose and I am not really sure where it is.

This is not just any ol snake either. Let me tell you what happened....

Our asparagus is growing insanely fast with this warm humid weather we have here right now. That means I pick the asparagus in the morning and then I pick it again that same night, same plant. It keeps me so busy and yesterday I was headed down to the self serve roadside stand we keep in front of our house to put some more asparagus in the cooler. As I came back up to my front porch, there, on the step that I had JUST stepped off, was the biggest, fatest garter snake I have ever seen.

And I have seen a lot of snakes.

So what did I do? Screamed. I stood in the middle of the driveway and screamed my head off for my boys to come rescue me.

Yup, you read that right. I called on my 10, 8, 6 and 4 year old to come rescue their 30 year old moma. I had to yell loud, they were out in a swampy area cooling off and catching frogs and turtles. But not snakes, no, snakes apparently like the house instead.

Even in my frightened state, it was sorta comical to see all my boys falling out of the woods and running thru the soft ground of the just turned over field to come to my rescue. They are good brave boys. S1 even was advising me as he ran "Just keep an eye on it!" "Watch where it goes!"

It wasn't going anywhere except maybe deeper in the hole in the step. I'd have pictures to show you this but the camera was in the house and to access the house I had to use the step and now you know why there were no pictures taken.

S4 wasn't too sure about that monster of a snake so he kept his distance across the driveway. S3 showed no fear and was ready to just pick it up but S1 arrived just in time to show some caution, which is good because the snake lurched and bit S1's shoe! That was almost my heel! S2 ran to get all the needed supplies to catch the awful thing and in a few moments they had the nasty monster of a snake in the bucket with a lid on it.

I am thankful that the boys I gave birth to could rescue their girly moma.

S1 recalled that a friend of ours wanted a snake so he called him and sure enough, he did. He promised to come for it soon.

The boys all gathered around the snake to check it out. It was missing one eye and had a scar all along its head. They didn't look too long, it kept lurching at them and they didn't want to get bit.

Husband came home and teased us all about how it had gotten loose. Since the boys were keeping it next to the kitchen door, I did not find that funny. Our door needs to be replaced and the whole bottom panel is loose with big hole in it. A cat could easily use it as a door to get in and out of. The hole in it is more than large enough for a snake to fit through.

This morning when we got up, we were running late (again) for school and the boys went out to quickly check on the snake one last time and it was GONE. MISSING!

Now, if you were a mean, one eyed, scar faced snake and you were a mastermind of escape, would you not think you hit the jack pot as you slithered your long self into a cool house?

I was afraid you would think that.

We can't find it. It's long gone somewhere...maybe it's back in its hole on the front step, maybe it's under the deck I walk across to get to the kitchen door (the deck has missing boards in it, and this thing is long enough to just stick it's head up and let me know it's there), or maybe it is in my house.

I have worn my barn boots all day long. And it's about ninety today (or close to it) so those stinkin boots are HOT and I would rather have my heeled cowboy boots but Sadie chewed those to smithereens (and i miss them at least once a week).

If you hear me screaming, you know we found out. And what is going to be worse, finding it hidden somewhere or it disappearing for forever?

Jr's First Birthday

It's so hard to believe that Jr has reached a full year old now. It doesn't seem possible that it was a year ago that I got the call on a field trip with S2 that he had been born...or that awful incident in where I was late coming home from the hospital because the cop thought I was drunk driving...remember that one?

But he is indeed a full year old. His favorite foods are hot dogs and watermelon and my chocolate chip cookies. But he was pretty impressed with his cow patterned birthday cake too.

I wouldn't have missed his birthday for anything at all...well, except for the fact that we drove to the WRONG township hall and realized it when we seen that there were no vehicles there...THAT was super embarrassing, like, crawl under the rock and wait for the day to end. But we made it to the party with a dramatic entrance and had so much fun watching him open all his presents and make a big mess with his cake.

My brother and sister in law are doing a phenomenal job with this little guy. They are some of the best first time parents I have ever seen in action. That I get to have a part in this little guy's life...well, that's something I can't even put into words.

Happy first birthday, Jr!!!!!!

Sadie Gave Me Poison Ivy....

...or else I think she did.

Here is how it happened.

Jr, who was over tired and didn't appreciate in any way the thought of me putting him down even for a moment, and S4, who had worked hard to make a plow (stick) on his tricycle (he secretly thinks that that his Daddy will find his plow genius and let him help plow tonight) and wanted to show it off, headed out with the dogs and a basket of laundry to hang on the line.

S4 was busy showing off his plow and Jr was busy just experiencing outdoor freedom, when both dogs began to bark. They barked ferociously, and then took off. Not seeing anything out of the ordinary, I figured it must have been a rabbit or something like that. I waited a bit and then called the dogs back. Sadie kept barking fiercely but Josie waddled on back. I finished hanging up the load of clothes and calling Sadie in answer to her barks. ("bark bark" pause "Sadie" pause "bark bark" etc)

I looked at a now happy Jr, a seriously sad his dog was missing S4, a more than fluffy dog who was sitting with her head cocked to me questioningly and sighed deeply. "Okay, let's go."

I lifted Jr to my shoulders where he immediately dug his chubby fingers thru my pony tail causing it to fall into my face and finally settled on hanging onto my ears as I took S4's hand and we followed Josie out to the great nasty, green, slimy swamp.

This swamp is the dividing line on our property. It would take little imagination to see alligators and long black snakes in it. It's just that nasty looking.

On the opposite side of the swamp, the part on our neighbors, was our black German shepherd Sadie barking ferociously at the terrible awful scary creature...our cat. Technically, it's not ours, but Georgia showed up last winter and liked the boys and table scraps they gave her so much she just stuck around. However, after this incident, she may take up residence some where else. I had to sorta chuckle when I thought about her getting all the way across that swamp and up safely in that tree. She musta seemed she had walked on water!

S4 was screaming in his most authoritative voice "Get-over-here-Sadie-and-I'll-give-you-a-bone." When she never even glance his way, he muttered "stinkin' darn dog". (His father taught him how to speak.)

Seeing we were getting no where, I decided to head toward the house again. As I went to turn back, I looked down at my flip flop clad (with pretty NYPD Beet nail polish on my toes) and seen I was standing in the middle of poison ivy.

I groaned aloud.

I had been so worried about Sadie I hadn't paid attention to the undergrowth we were walking on, or what we had to walk through to get out. Poison Ivy everywhere I looked.

For all my life I had never had poison ivy, until S4 was born and then I got a case of it that lasted all summer long. It was miserable. And I have gotten it every year since. Apparently, here on the farm, we grow great poison ivy.

So we headed back, more than fluffy Josie, jabbering away at the disobedience of Sadie S4 whose hand I was holding and clinging to my ears as he sat on my shoulder and my free hand held him there Jr. Really, we must have been a sight.

Just as we got up to the house, Sadie appeared. Soaked. Covered in green slime. A happy look on her face.

As soon as we got in the house, I shucked my jeans off (and desperately prayed no on would stop and need asparagus) and jumped in the tub with S4 to scrub our feet and hands down with Tecnu. I buy Tecnu in the largest quantities I can. I scrubbed and then I scrubbed just to be sure again and doused my flip flops and his crocs too and let them soak for a bit.

So far, no poison ivy. Or Georgia the cat. I'll keep you updated.

A Desperate Day Calls for Red High Heels or Painted Toes

Today was beautiful. So very close your eyes and soak in the sun and sigh and thank God for such beauty.

Wonderful day.

And I had mountains of laundry to do. I think we have spoken before on such things. But lets just put it this way, my mother seen my laundry pile and told me to go to the laundry mat...and start purging boys clothes too.

I was working on enjoying the chore of hanging the clothes on the line because the lilacs were hanging in there for me. I could drink in their intoxicating sweet smell.

So, I am working on hanging clothes on the line, cleaning carpets (a long story I won’t bore you with) and S4 informs me he isn’t feeling well. This is unlike him. He laid on the couch and informed how his tummy, his legs, his head, his toes all hurt. And then he napped so I know he wasn’t feeling well. I brought down all his stuffed animals, tucked him in on the couch, filled his favorite Lightning cup with Gatorade, sat by his side when he asked.

Yet, when he was in the bathroom puking he stops and says “See, I told you I had to frow up”. What’s the point with arguing with a four year old.

As he continued to not feel well and run for our one toilet in the house to puke or not to, he would ask me to sit with him and rub his back. He’d hold his hand up and show me a fist, fingers, hand...however it was he felt he needed his back rubbed. It totally cracked me up but I couldn’t laugh at him. That would be mean.

So, I was cleaning puke and doing laundry. You can see how my day was going. And on facebook, two of my friends on opposite sides of the country who do not know each other were also lamenting laundry.

It was in the air, I tell ya.

So what did I do with one of my friends? We looked up red high heels. Because that is what you do when you are folding laundry and feeling unstylish.

I have long dreamed of wearing dark jeans and a cute blouse and RED HEELS. And I found a pair I just love. But they are eighty dollars. I can buy a lot of groceries for eighty dollars. (and they are sold out)

Sigh.

I was thinking of the cute outfit I could have, the Broadway show I could see, the glamour I may one day find as I was rubbing S4’s back and waiting for him to puke when I noticed how badly my unpainted toes look.

So, as soon as dinner was done, I grabbed my nail polish, sat on the stool in the kitchen, and painted my toe nails. My hubby was very late for dinner (never got home till quarter to nine) or he would have joined my boys in thinking I had truly gone crazy.

Girl crazy.

Cuz sometimes, a girl has gotta do what a girl has gotta do. And if a girl has to pass on beautiful shoes, fold camo laundry, clean puke, resteam clean the carpet, well, at least she can do it with her toes a beautiful shade of NYPD Beet. I feel much better now! (as does S4, who after puking got ALL BETTER in time for Hubby to come home....I'm glad he is better but you know how it goes, Hubby is wondering if he really was sick.)

Sadie is at it Again....

Yesterday was a wonderful day for drying clothes on the line. And since I have mountains upon mountains upon mountains of laundry to do, and since the boys are not allowed to swamp and mud play until I catch up on the laundry, I was using full advantage of my thought- it -would- be- huge- forever- but- now- it -is -really- too -small- clothes line. I had washed our comforter and hung it out there and when dinner was over, headed out to get it before the dew got heavy on it.

As I walked out the door, Sadie refused to tag along. This is highly unusual. She ALWAYS tags along with me. I called her a bit and she looked at me with her sleepy looking eyes as if to say "I have played hard and just want to rest."

That should have been my first warning.

I went out, got the ONE blanket, came right back in and Sadie was not where I had left her. I walked around the corner to head towards the bedroom and there was Sadie, on the couch, in the dark living room.

She looked up, ears totally pricked up, a wide eyed "I have done nothing wrong" look on her face.

"Whatcha doin?" I asked her as I flipped on the light.

And there, there on the couch was the DINNER HAM !!!!!!!

If the cat had been in the room, I am certain she would have blamed her, or the other dog, or the boys....but she was caught fair and square.

Ug....if it's not one thing, it's another.

And she is forever more walking out the door with me. I will not fall to her "I am soooooo sleepy and sweet and tired and not hungry" look again.

Today I'm Over at Destiny in Bloom!!!

And I am just thrilled about it! This is a GREAT blog that you can follow via twitter or facebook as well as on your blog read. I have been impressed with them since they began this great site. Stop by and leave a note, and then browse the site. It is truly great. I always love to see the artwork they have picked out as well.

This blog they have featured is one of my mom's most favorite blogs I have written. Thanks for picking it out for me, Mugs!

Can't thank Destiny in Bloom enough for the honor to be a featured writer today! THANK YOU! !

http://destinyinbloom.com/where-is-my-birthday/